No one likes change

Depression is a natural phase of divorce. If the depression becomes severe, you are unable to sleep, dramatic weight loss\gain, job is in jeopardy, then go to a doctor for a medication evaluation. If you are feeling mildly or moderately depressed, some crying, some loss of sleep and moderate weight change, then go out and join a club, work out physically or mentally but move forward. Mild to moderate depression is expected but must be addressed so that it does not become severe.

Fighting depression

Before going to ask a doctor for a prescription to alleviate your depression, attempt to work it out more naturally. The depression that comes with divorce is real; it is not a chemical imbalance or an unnatural state, so treat it naturally. Exercise, volunteer at a church or hospital, read life affirming books, or listen to uplifting music. Take control of what you can control!

The death of a marriage

When you are going through a divorce it is the death of a marriage. There is a grieving process. If you are the person who left then the grieving process has been completed. You have gone through the stages; denial, anger, bargaining, and acceptance. If you are the person who has been left it has just begun. Allow yourself to experience the process, all of the stages. You will find that often a therapist is better at assisting you then a friend. A death is a death and it takes time to heal, but the important issue is that you will heal.

Depression in the person you are divorcing

Often when you are filing for a divorce and your spouse does not want to be divorced, you must cope with seeing them going into a depression. This is a difficult position to be in, on one hand you know that you can no longer be married to this person, on the other hand you do not want to see them hurt. If you see that your soon to be ex is experiencing depression, tell them that they must get help. Call up one of your inlaws or a mutual friend and ask that they intervene and attempt to get your ex some help. Do not feel guilty, do not weaken, as you can not be happy if you return to a life that does not work for you. Assist, but resist the temptation to become a human sacrifice.

The emotional roller coaster of divorce

When a couple separates it is common to feel depressed. Get into counseling, individual or group, so that you will know you are not alone.

Holiday blues

When you begin to become sad or frustrated during this holiday season; look inside. Holidays are often disappointing for families, divorced or intact; the cause being that we all think that we should be having a Walton´s Holiday. Learn the true meaning of holidays and find inner peace.

Lonely? Get connected!

Many churches today have a network of single adults, many of whom are single parents. Force yourself to attend a meeting, even if you know no one there. Most of the people there experienced the same thing when they attended their first meeting, so they will know exactly how you feel and should welcome you warmly. Get connected. It helps keep you emotionally sane to know you are not alone, that there are other people in the boat with you. So get on board.