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When the children want to know why their parents are getting divorced, do not go into detail. Tell the children that you fight too much and you have both tried, but cannot resolve the issues. Do not tell them it is because mom sees other men or dad has a girlfriend, this will only hurt the children and their sense of self. Tell the children that you each love them and that this will never change, but that mom and dad can no longer live together.
Your children need to know the truth. They will find out the real reasons for the divorce at some point. The age of the children requires a different approach. Not all parents love their children and children realize that and just feel they are lied to when parents don't own up to the fact that they are leaving the marriage because they are putting their own needs above their family's.
I did tell the knid we are having problems and that mom was talking to some other man, should I have done this?